'My ex’s mom showed up at my apartment unannounced': Woman pretends she's not home while ex's mom demands to see her kids, police get involved

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Sep 25, 2025 2:00 PM EDT

No one likes a person with a tendency to show up at your place unannounced, especially if that person is your ex's mother.

Yes, this author had the unfortunate experience of going through a difficult divorce with her partner and gaining sole custody of their kids. Now, her ex is fully out of the picture, but evidently, his mother refuses to get out of their lives. While we appreciate the experiences of a loving grandmother who just wants to spend more time with her grandkids, it sounds like this was a pretty contentious divorce that will take time for all parties to properly heal. To have this lady continue to intrude upon the life of her son's ex-wife is a complete and total violation of privacy and trust during such a challenging transition.

The first time this happened, the mother showed up out of nowhere and knocked on the author's door. Typically, you have to be let into the building before getting to any of the apartments, so this lady must have known she was crossing a boundary if she snuck in without announcing herself in the lobby. Still, the author endured the visit but warned her ex's mother never to do this again. In fact, she even went so far as to be specific in her ground rules so that they would not be misconstrued in the future. She told the lady that in order to see her grandkids, she would need to notify the author a full week in advance so that they can set up a time that is mutually beneficial for all. 

Of course, that promise was not kept for long. When the woman showed up yet again without any advanced warning, the author decided not to answer the door at all. Why should she? After all, she refused to honor their agreement. Giving her the privilege of seeing her grandkids would only encourage the idea that this behavior was acceptable. Unfortunately, this lady would not be ignored (much like Glenn Close's character said in Fatal Attraction). 

The policy ended up having to intervene, which, of course, was not part of the author's plan for her evening. Keep scrolling below for the full story and for the best reactions from several members of this online community.

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  • This happened a couple of years ago but I was talking about crazy MIL stories with a friend and she thinks I was an AH.
    via JaqueSarai
  • Two babies and their mother sit on a sofa while watching something on an iPad.
    via Alexander Dummer

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I have sole custody of my children. My ex and his family live about a 9 hour drive from me. One day at around 9am there was knocking on my bedroom window. I peeked through the bottom
    via JaqueSarai
  • of the blinds and just see woman's sneakers. So I peek higher and make eye contact with my ex's mom. All I can. think is W ?
    via JaqueSarai
  • The apartments where I live are not gated so anybody can drive onto the property, just not go in buildings without a key. Which means, ex's mom couldn't knock on my door because she couldn't enter my building.
    via JaqueSarai
  • Anyway, now that she's seen me I change and go see why she's there. Only reason why she has my address is because a few months back she asked to mail some stuff for the kids & I dumbly gave her my address. She tells me she was in the neighborhood. I
    via JaqueSarai
  • asked her why she didn't call me before arriving and she said it was a "last minute decision". I let her in and she sees the kids for a bit. When she leaves I tell her next time she needs to give me a heads up before arriving, and I'm not talking 10 minutes before, I need at least a 1 week notice.
    via JaqueSarai
  • So, this is where I might be the AH. About 4 months later she pulls this stunt AGAIN. When I hear the tapping on my window. I know exactly who it is. I don't bother looking out the window.
    via JaqueSarai
  • She starts calling me. After the 5th call, I answer. She tells me to open up because she wants to see the kids. I'm like what? I'm not even home- why she didn't tell me she was coming? I'm 45 minutes away visiting my dad with the kids. She demands dad's address - I
    via JaqueSarai
  • refuse to give it to her. I tell her I have no idea when I will be home. Yes, complete lie. Anyway, she doesn't believe me, she thinks I'm home, again says it was a last minute decision. I
    via JaqueSarai
  • hang up on her, I'm getting texts from ex demanding I let his mom see the kids. I tell him what I told her -I'm not home.
    via JaqueSarai
  • An older woman in a white jacket and glasses stares at the camera with a look of consternation.
    via Christian Buehner

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Imagine my surprise when I hear the police banging on my door a few minutes later! I don't answer. I get a call from a random number - the police officer. He is there to perform a wellness check because ex's mom hasn't heard from me in 3 days and she's extremely worried. Also,
    via JaqueSarai
  • according to him, it is illegal not to answer the door when a police officer knocks. I tell him she is lying- I just spoke to her on the phone, she showed up unannounced. I made it clear to her not to do that, and I am out with family and I don't need to come back just because she showed up unannounced,
    via JaqueSarai
  • she is ex's mom and I don't have to talk to her. After that phone call I get a text from ex calling me an AH and how hard would it have been to let his mom see the kids when she drove all the way there just to see them.
    via JaqueSarai
  • I want to make it clear - I don't mind her visiting, I don't mind her being around my kids - but I cant stand her showing up unannounced and demanding to see my kids like that. It was like she was on a weird power trip.
    via JaqueSarai
  • WhereWeretheAdults 6h ago . NTA. Woman weaponized the police against you. Woman no longer gets any part of your life. Next time she tries anything just use the phrase, "You called the police on me." When she deflects, "You lied to the police." Just keep banging on some version of that. Ex gets the same story. "She called the police on me and lied to them. She is dangerous."
    via JaqueSarai
  • 16Bunny 6h ago She was on a weird power trip. Same with your ex. The whole calling the police thing reaffirmed that. You're NTA. Best to keep away from ex & his insane mother. If you can I would consider moving so she no longer knows where you live. Any visitation your ex has can be in a neutral place.
    via JaqueSarai
  • Wonderful_Nerve_8308 6h ago NTA the police officer told you that your ex mom said you haven't responded in 3 days? I think you just got the perfect opportunity to report her to the police for making false report and harassing you with a wellness check.
    via JaqueSarai

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family drama aita entitled parents funny moms AITAH parenting entitled people karma family mom entitled people
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